I grew up in a very Pro Women environment by that I mean my parents especially my father always advocated that girls are as important as boys in our society. Now coming from a Pakistani background this was a rare thing for a father to be promoting to his daughters. Most South Asian fathers live for the day that their daughters are married off and aim to do this quick. However, my father was like no other father he was determined to build independent, self-efficient and opinionated young ladies.
So as you can imagine my sisters and I grew up with a certain sense of freedom within the constraints of our religion and culture (at the end of the day boundaries are there for our protection).
As girls, ladies, women whatever term you feel fits we have many struggles compared to our counterparts, from trying to balance work and personal life, to asking for what we deserve ( still can’t believe women are paid less than a men for the same job in today’s world) to looking what society deems as beautiful. Its tough out there and it’s sometimes made even harder when certain and I mean a few select women see fit to bring other women down via social media.
There is nothing more unbecoming than a women who has no sense of sisterhood.
Most women in their 20’s are trying to establish themselves, learn lessons and build a strong exterior in order to guard and protect what’s on the inside. I know personally my 20’s is where I learnt big life lessons, got my first major career break, lost friends and made new ones and dealt with grief.
Now my 30’s is where I finally relaxed and just went with the flow, cared less about what people thought, detoxed out toxic and negative people and above all learnt to love myself.
So I want to share with you what I feel most of us ladies should know by our 30’s:
Be your own favorite, now I know this is easier said than done but if you are not going to love yourself then you cannot expect others to love you.
This is one of the single most empowering thing you can do for yourself. I feel women who know how to make money and take care of themselves financially are far less dependent on others which gives them the power to dictate their own path.
Quality Over Quantity
I found that having a select few like minded, close friends is better than having a group of acquaintances that you hardly know.
About boys, girls, other peoples judgement, other peoples comments, society’s idea of beauty, Society’s pressure to be married, buy a home and have a child. Cultural pressures to fit a certain idea of what a girl should speak, look and behave like.
I do this at least once every year I feel it’s the best form of self-care and being reliant on yourself and no other. Getting lost is when you can find yourself.
By your 30’s you will know what products are good and which are bad. You should also at this age be introducing some form of anti-ageing product to your skincare routine.
Health Is Wealth
I ran a 10k, half marathon and the London Marathon all in my 30’s at the same time my chronic illness had 3 relapses, it just goes to show that your body is capable of anything and you should learn to respect and love it.
Investment In Fashion
You will come to realise in your 30’s how disposable fashion as fun as it is it does not last. A high end designer shoe or handbag can really give your wardrobe that elegant sophisticated look. It will also become a piece of investment that you could hand down.
Forgive But Never Forget
They say forgiveness is more for the peace of mind of the person who is forgiving rather than the person receiving it. I truly believe this, the happiness you get from letting go and not dwelling on the past is the only way you can move on in life. However, I do think one should not forget.
I read somewhere once that Comparison is the killer of joy, which is true in so many ways. Remember this is your life and it does not have to meet any form of criteria or timeline set by society or culture.
Oh there are so many more but I feel this post will just spiral out of control.
Are there any things that you think we should know by our 30’s?